My daughter, who is in her early 30s, will sing with the
church choir during Sunday morning service tomorrow. For the first
time. Ever.
“Mom, do you have a few minutes to help me with something
this evening; for about a half-hour or so?” There was something shy and vulnerable
in the way she asked; a tone that immediately held my attention. “I need to
practice my song parts… and, I want you to help me, if you don't mind.”
I was so tickled when she decided to join the choir a few
weeks ago. I had no idea she had an interest in singing. She’s always loved
music, was first-chair cellist through junior and high school, and often went
with me to recording sessions and gigs from the time she was a baby. But she’d
never indicated any interest in singing.
Naturally I was eager to oblige her request. But I was still
struck by the shy and vulnerable tone.
"I have to do the warm-up exercises first,” she fumbled with
a small digital voice recorder. “I recorded my singing lesson.” Singing lesson?
“I had a singing lesson from Jim Werner; he’s also the choir director. Will you
help me with the first note? Shouldn’t we stand up?”
I hesitated, my lazy singing attitude in conflict with the
serious focused singing of my younger days. I stood up as she pushed the play
button on her voice recorder. She and Jim Werner were running scales. She
pushed the stop button.
“You got the note?” She asked, quietly. I repeated the scale
as I’d heard on the recording. She started to join me, then stopped, and sat
back down. “I’m nervous.”
“About tomorrow?” I asked.
“No; I’m nervous singing in front of you,” she said, then
looked down at her bare feet.
I never expected that.
“Why? Why me?” I listened as she
shared; and learned so much about my daughter in those minutes. "When I was four or five years old I remember you told
someone that I didn’t have good pitch,” she said, “so, I didn’t sing, but I
always wanted to.”
My heart sank. Her name is Melody. Had I so influenced her decision
to keep her music inside herself? When she was four, I was ...